See Fred Blechman's article on our orignal BC-10 Binary Clock in the 3/94 issue of Nuts & Volts Magazine.
ElectronicsUSA.com Presents:
FRED'S FUNNIES!
Humorous Stories By Well Known Electronics Author & Inventor
Fred Blechman, K6UGT
See Fred Blechman's article on our orignal BC-10 Binary Clock in the 3/94 issue of Nuts & Volts Magazine.
ElectronicsUSA.com Presents:
FRED'S FUNNIES!
Humorous Stories By Well Known Electronics Author & Inventor
Fred Blechman, K6UGT
An accomplished writer in all respects, Fred Blechman has written over 700 magazine articles and five books about electronics and microcomputers since 1961. He is a regular contributor to Nuts & Volts Magazine, where you can find many of his infomative and educational articles. We are very pleased and especially honored to present the following stories for your enjoyment and entertainment. Thanks Fred for sharing these amusing articles!
Check out Fred's latest book:
Simple Low Cost Electronics Projects by Fred Blechman
Index To Fred's Funnies
"Confessions of an Electronic Genius"
by Fred Blechman
(C) Copyright Fred Blechman 1995
********************** SIDEBAR *************************
This story is EXACTLY as written over 26 years ago for an amateur radio "ham" magazine called "73." Little has changed since, except transistors, integrated circuits, and digital electronics have added to the mystery...and now I'm called a "computer genius!" NOT! Many of you will know what I mean...
Have you ever been asked to fix a single-sideband transmitter, even though you weren't really sure how a simple oscillator works? Well, I have. In fact, I'm always being asked questions I shouldn't be asked. Why? Because in the minds of some around me, despite my claims to the contrary, I am an electronic genius!
How did I achieve this status? How can you attain for yourself the dubious distinction of being an "electronic genius?" Well, if you promise not to blab it around, here's the story....
The Genius Is Born
I suppose it all started when I decided to build my own radio-control equipment for a model airplane. The fact that I knew nothing about electronics didn't stop me; I was surrounded at work by electronic geniuses who could solve virtually any problem involving the lowly electron. Or so I thought.
Anyhow, the kit I bought was a real collection of mysterious goodies; wire, coils, tubes, phenolic, and those cute little cylindrical things with the pretty colored bands. I meticulously followed the instructions and sketches in the assembly of the receiver, a simple "single-tube super-regenerative receiver," according to the description.
Since I had no equipment to check out its operation, I took it to work for the electronic geniuses to fire-up. They performed their usual mystical rites with strange looking devices. The receiver refused to be impressed by the display...and just did not work!
The next two weeks were almost too painful to describe. Complete lunch hours were consumed in discussion, theory and testing by the geniuses. My greatest contribution was keeping my fingers crossed. The geniuses, individually and collectively, all had their chance at trying to seduce "Fred's Folly" into operation. Words like superheterodyne, intermediate frequency, converter, and mixer were generously sprinkled throughout their discussions. "But," I kept repeating, "this is a superregenerative receiver!"
The geniuses thought I had flipped. "Regenerative receivers went out with the Model T" they said, patting me on the head sympathetically.
Well, they finally gave up, and I was about to take up basket weaving as a new endeavor, when a hot spell proved fortunate. I noticed one of the silver-colored cartridge-shaped things in the receiver was leaking at one end, apparently from the heat. Could this be a bad part? It was marked ".01 MFD 100V." When this unit was replaced, the receiver worked. I had fixed it! The geniuses just shook their heads. "You are truly an electronic genius" they confided...
The Genius Grows
The bug had bitten. More receivers, more transmitters...and many more problems. Somehow, never really knowing how or why, I always managed to stumble on a solution. Pretty soon I found myself fixing other guys' equipment. You've heard the expression "the blind leading the blind"...
About this time I decided to really find out what electronics was all about. Somehow I was not able to find anyone who was willing to sit down with me for twenty minutes and tell me all there is to know about electronics. So I attended night classes at the local high school, where I got to twirl knobs in the lab. I bought test equipment with knobs of my own to twirl. I repaired every radio the neighbors found in their attics. And, most important of all, I subscribed to 73 Magazine.
My reputation grew. Radio repairing is, after all, mostly tube changing, dial-cord restringing, replacement of obviously cooked parts, and a generous seasoning of good luck. (Knowing what you're doing can replace the good luck; in my case the good luck was the essential ingredient.) "You," they would tell me, "are an electronic genius!" By this time I was able to identify at least three different kinds of parts.
The Genius and the Theory
I found myself more and more becoming a victim of the never expressed, but universally accepted, theory of the masses: "He who knows anything about electronics knows everything about electronics." There is, however, a lesser known corollary to this theory: "He who knows anything about any particular branch of electronics knows practically nothing about any other branch of electronics!" I couldn't convince anyone that the latter theory more expressed my capabilities. "If it plugs into the wall, or uses a battery, Fred knows all about it," they insisted.
The Genius Takes to the Air
Then I got my ham ticket. That really did it! When my roof began sprouting weird antennas, and the neighbors' TV sets began acting in a strange manner, they were more convinced than ever that another Steinmetz was their private electronic consulting engineer. I was asked about everything from ailing TV sets (I carry service insurance on my own set) to improperly operating electric blankets (when mine quit recently, I bought a new one.) And it doesn't end there; I've even found myself answering questions on the air about how to plate-modulate a transmitter, or how to eliminate chirp on CW. Sometimes I have some idea what I'm talking about, but certainly not always. However, if I tell them I don't know what I'm talking about, then I am considered overly modest; if I offer no suggestions, the conclusion is that I don't care enough to even think about the problem. A dilemma. I have found it easier to give them an answer they don't understand than to try to convince them that I'm talking through my chapeau.
The Genius Goes Stereo
Take the other night, for instance. Andy, who has known me long enough to know better, brought over a stereo tape recorder he had just built from a kit...his first tussle with electronics. He said that the left channel was dead. Not being a tape recorder specialist, or any other kind of specialist, I did the only thing I could think of at the moment; I plugged in the "kluge" and turned it on. Music poured forth from both channels, loud and clear.
"What did you do to it?" Andy asked.
"Nothing," I replied.
"There you go being modest again," he said. "All you electronic geniuses are alike."
Then we tried to record. No erase. So I unbuttoned the whole works and looked at the maze of wire and stuff and things inside the chassis. I noticed two shielded cables from the erase head terminating in two plugs on the chassis. On a wild hunch (my usual method) I swapped the two plugs in their sockets. This cured the trouble. To Andy this was sheer wizardry. When I tried to explain the four-track stereo system, and the operation of the record and erase oscillator, he absorbed about as much as a third grader trying to learn the Pythagorian Theorem.
That's about the time the left-channel playback went dead. I had no recourse but to resort to the scientific approach. Using the dirty wooden handle of a small, dirty paintbrush that happened to be lying on my dirty workbench, I pushed and shoved everything in sight under the chassis. Responding to this precision trouble-shooting technique, the left channel burst forth in full bloom. More probing disclosed that a single strand of shielding had lodged itself against the grid of the left channel pre-amp tube!
Now the left-channel magic-eye record level indicator tube was acting oddly. Andy was obviously right-handed! No amount of pushing and shoving with the paintbrush handle did any good. This exhausted my supply of magic tricks, so I suggested that we put the whole works back in the case and be glad that it hadn't gone up in smoke. All buttoned up, we gave it the final check. No one was more surprised than I when everything worked, including the left-channel magic-eye indicator!
"You did something when I wasn't looking," accused Andy.
With a knowing expression, I replied, "The hand is quicker than the 'eye,' my friend..."
by Fred Blechman
(C) Copyright Fred Blechman 1993
Many times in organizing a task, such as setting up a data file, designing a computer program, selecting new equipment, or managing your hard disk, you are faced with decisions that can either simplify or complicate the task. Do you K.I.S.S. it or K.I.C.K. it?
You have probably heard of the K.I.S.S. approach - "Keep It Simple, Stupid!" You may give this a lot of lip service, while you dream up bigger and better complexities. Instead of KISSing the job, you are probably KICKing it. K.I.C.K.? That stands for "Keep It Confusing, Knucklehead!"
After all, if you confuse everyone around you, it protects your job. They'll think you're so smart they can't get along without you. You become the local "guru" by being a KICKer rather than a KISSer.
I've been amazed over the years to see so many examples of KICKers in action - even outside the computer world. Most doctors, lawyers, accountants and engineers are KICKers rather than KISSers. Psychologists and psychiatrists are big KICKers. Probably the biggest KICKers of all are government workers and bureaucrats at all levels. How about politicians, who, after all, usually got their KICK training as lawyers?
In the musical world, in 1934 Cole Porter wrote "I Get a KICK Out of You", with "flying too high" as part of the lyrics. Apparently he changed his thinking by 1948 when he wrote the Broadway musical "KISS Me, Kate."
I was aware of the deep entrenchment of KICKers in the corporate structure when I worked in the aerospace industry as an engineer, surrounded by KICKers at all levels. Every time I tried to KISS, I'd get KICKed! Cost-plus-fixed-fee contracts don't benefit from KISSing, only KICKing.
However, when there is an incentive to KISS, complexity gets KICKed out. Businessmen - especially self-employed entrepreneurs - are usually KISSers. Why? Because they are dealing with their own bucks! The more they KISS, the bigger the "bottom line."
KISSing The KICKers
I taught myself electronics, many years ago, by reading Popular Electronics, Radio-Electronics, Electronics Illustrated and other electronic magazines (most of them gone today.) I was frequently appalled at the complexity of some projects that could be done with two or three transistors instead of the dozen used in some KICKer articles. So I started writing KISS articles. I became known for my KISSing.
Then I got into my own part-time Amway distributor networking business. I started KICKing until I saw how much time and effort I was wasting on needless tasks. As I saw negative cash flow, I became the biggest KISSer in town! The business became so successful, I retired from aerospace after five years - and haven't worked for anyone else in the 23 years since.
When the paperwork in our growing business got overwhelming, I bought a small computer and looked for programs for my wife to use. She's a great KISSer! But all the programmers I found were KICKers. They wanted to address the power of the computer instead of the simplicity of our needs. I KISSed them off and wrote my own programs.
My programs were simple to learn and simple to use - a KISSers delight. Originally written in 1980 for a 16K RAM TRS-80 Model I, eight programs address the needs of the business rather than the capabilities of a computer. The $49 "AMBIZ-PAK" has long since been improved and converted to the IBM PC.
How to KISS
I don't keep the prices of thousands of product prices in memory. That's too slow and awkward, so I KISS the top 400, and the program easily handles the others. I don't do inventory control; it's easier to look on the shelf. I don't keep track of each distributor's volume of business all month. It's faster to add the order totals on a calculator for the relative few that qualify for bonuses based on volume. I don't do double-entry bookkeeping or generate a profit and loss statement; I just keep putting money in the bank. The names and addresses of my distributors are still on 3 x 5 file cards. I don't know (and don't care) how many bottles or boxes of particular products I've sold in the last three years, by customer, by date, by amount, or by any other parameter. I'm a KISSer, and have better things to do than analyze things that don't matter. If I can't KISS it, I don't do it.
The "proof of the pudding" is that my wife, Ev, who HATES computers, uses these programs for distributor order processing and bonus statements, customer invoices, and bookkeeping - and now has TWO computers! She tells me that if it weren't for the computers and my simple programs, I would be doing the paperwork!
Wanna' Become A LOVER?
This whole KISS philosophy will probably shock some of you - especially those of you who use a $400 computer program with an 80486 PC/AT computer, 120 megabyte hard disk, and VGA color monitor to balance your check book. You may be using a powerful database program to keep track of your Christmas Card List or recipes, or a $500 word processing program and $2000 laser printer for your monthly letter to your parents. Would you buy a big truck to carry a bottle of milk from the store? Is it possible that's what you're doing with your computer?
Next time you're faced with a task, ask yourself a few questions. Is this the simplest way to do this job? Is this "overkill"? Isn't there an easier way? Would 3 x 5 cards be simpler? Would you rather be a KISSer or a KICKer? Remember, KISSers eventually become LOVERs ("Leave Out Various Extras, Rube!")
"Memories Are Made of This"
by Fred Blechman
(C) Copyright Fred Blechman 1993
I don't know about you, but I'm confused about the various kinds of computer memory. Someone, somewhere seems to get some kind of thrill by creating names for memory (and most other computer-related hardware) that defy explanation. Furthermore, the names sound so much alike that more confusion results.
We've all heard of "RAM" (random access memory) and "ROM" (read-only memory.) Sound alike, don't they? They even LOOK alike - integrated circuit chips that can only be told apart by their mysterious markings.
How about "expanded memory" and "extended memory?" After reading at least a dozen articles about these, I've decided that even the article authors don't really know the similarities and differences between these - especially when software can apparently make one simulate the other!
So I've decided to add to the confusion with some new memory nomenclature. See if you can keep these in YOUR memory.
Expended Memory: This is the computer's memory you are already using. Some is RAM, some is ROM, some is expanded, and some is extended.
Distended Memory: This is expended expanded extended memory beyond the address capabilities of the computer unless you add an 80386 coprocessor.
Unattended Memory: This is memory you're not yet using, but available in your machine. Everything beyond expended expanded extended distended memory. May be used to run flight simulators in background mode while your boss is nearby.
Intended Memory: This is what you'll need to run Windows '95 and all future applications from Microsoft. You thought you could survive with 8MB? Don't be ridiculous!
Pretended Memory: This is what you thought you had when you bought your computer - and later found out would require adding some expensive chips. Typically, this is having a sixteen megabyte memory board in a machine with only one megabyte of RAM actually installed.
Tremendous Memory: Many gigabytes.
Stupendous Memory: Beyond tremendous.
Defended Memory: This has something to do with the 80386 "protected mode." Don't ask me; I don't even work here.
Contented Memory: This is the portion of memory where all your happy little TSR programs joyfully reside, snugly hidden away from your applications, but ready to jump into action to please you - or interfere with the program you're trying to run!
Frequented Memory: Your disk cashe stays here, often used and constantly on call.
Demented Memory: The part of memory reserved for thriller games like Dungeons and Dragons.
Suspended Memory: This is where your program is hiding when your computer "goes out to lunch."
Surrendered Memory: This is the memory you recover when you hit the RESET button.
Out-Of Memory: This is the no-memory land to which most of my programs seem to find their way.
And here are some more memory names for IBM to use, as yet undefined: enchanted, lamented, amended, offended, blended, fomented, and rescinded. Do you have some others?
"Fred's Twenty-Five Mistresses"
by Ev Blechman
(C) Copyright Ev Blechman 1993
(As you can tell, this next story was written by Fred's wife Ev!)
My husband, Fred, has had twenty-five mistresses. At least, that's all I know about. Of course, they say the wife is the last to know - but not in my case.
It happened! Not one, not two, not three, not four, but twenty-five times! And the sad thing is that I found out about the first one the moment he carried HER across our threshhold.
It was a cold January morning in 1978. Fred and I had only been married two months when he brought HER right to our doorstep. She was well disguised, but I was immediately intimidated by her because she weighed less than I did!
Fred carried her over the threshold with no explanation and then, just like the ravenous beauty that pops out of the cake at a bachelor's last gig, SHE popped out of her carefully designed outer garments.
Physically, my contours were much more curvy than hers. She was small, definitely angular, but solid. I should have deduced that from her outer garments. While I try to maintain a good California tan and a sunny disposition, she appeared in chic grey with black and silver accessories, and had a distinctive cool and precise manner.
The delicate way in which Fred handled - and fondled - her should have warned me of the constant confrontations which were to become part of our future, and which I've endured now for fifteen years. I admit to a slight scowl as I noticed Fred handling her so gingerly, and carefully, like a thing of great fragility. I didn't take his pulse, but it must have been racing as he picked her up, turned her over, inspected her closely, and gently ran his hands all over her frame.
She arrived, reminiscent of a bride and her trousseau, with various accessories. Fred immediately took charge, attaching the accessories in the right places. I couldn't help taking note of his excited manner, his joy, the wondrous expression of anticipation of glorious hours that he would spend with her.....and I was jealous.
Because I was Fred's new bride, there was a strong obligation on Fred's time; I expected it to be spent with me! When we got married he said "Stick with me, Babe. We'll get rich building our Amway business together."
I won out for a short while. Then came the long, lonely hours waiting for him to leave HER side. I never knew when I would see the light go out in the guest room where he had made a home for her. Many times, late into the night, I would reach out to touch him, only to find that he was not there. However, he was always at my side when I woke up in the morning - but dead to the world!
I was beside myself. I had overheard Fred tell a friend on the telephone that he was teaching her to do just about anything he wanted. No wonder he appeared so haggard as he dragged himself into bed in the wee hours of the morning.
I quickly discovered a marked distinction between us. I didn't have all the answers, she did. And my Fred was trying to find them! I built up quite a resentment over this third party who was spending twenty-four hours a day in our new-bride paradise.
Something had to be done. I'd had it. Fred was being "wenched" away from me. One night I stomped my way towards the guest room and flung open the door. Just as I suspected, there was Fred, hovering over her as he had day after day for the last six months. She remained still - not a move. But I heard her humming to him. My presence was completely ignored. I hurled out of the room, slammed the door behind me and waited for some response. None. They were totally engrossed doing their thing together.
Hours later Fred came into our bedroom and announced he'd done all he could with her, and that he'd need to get another more powerful "model". I said nothing as my fury built up. He had made up his mind and my silence was mistaken for acquiescence. He got three more. All from the same family!
As time went by, Fred had twenty-five of these - you guessed it - microcomputers under our roof (although, thank goodness, not all at the same time!) Instead of being restricted to just the guest room, Fred used a total of three bedrooms, and spent more and more time running from one bedroom to the other. Over a period of time, some left as new ones arrived.
Just imagine how you would feel if you saw your home was invaded first by a TRS-80 Model I, then three Model IIIs, two Model 4s, two Model 4Ps, two Sinclair ZX-81s, a Timex Sinclair 1500, a Timex Sinclair 2068, a Radio Shack MC10, a Coleco ADAM, an Apple IIc, a Sanyo MBC 555, a Sinclair QL, two Sinclair Spectrums, an IBM PC/XT Clone, a 286 clone, a booksize PC/XT, a Toshiba 1000 laptop, a Laser PC4 notebook, and a Microgold 286 portable. (Know any wife who would learn the names of her husband's twenty-five mistresses?)
At this point in time, there are only twelve micros left, and like a family, they share some of the bedrooms, the play room, and the office. It took a while to convince me that I would be able to accept and eventually love, if not all, one or two of Fred's "mistresses." Believe it or not, I can't wait to get my hands on one every day when I do paperwork for our Amway business - with the $39 "AMBIZ-PAK" of eight programs Fred wrote while I thought he was "fooling around." Maybe a wife IS the last one to know.......
About the Author: Ev Blechman is a former professional dancer and movie script writer. She and Fred are retired Amway Emerald Direct Distributors.
"Blechman's Ten Laws of Computing"
By Fred Blechman
I've owned 26 microcomputers, I've written over 500 magazine articles and five books specifically about microcomputer hardware and software since 1978 - and I've come to the following conclusions, which I call "Blechman's Ten Laws of Computing":
(1) "When it's manufactured, it's already 'obsolete' - but still far more powerful than you need."
(2) "When you try to use it, it's incompatible with everything you have that used to work."
(3) "When you try to return it, they're out of business - or suddenly don't understand English."
(4) "No matter how big your hard drive, it will be filled within 30 days or less - mostly with things you'll never use."
(5) "Nothing works the first time, and never works when you try to show it off."
(6) "Everything you use is attacking your body with electromagnetic radiation of various sorts."
(7) "Any software upgrade costing less than $20 is an admission of guilt."
(8) "Version 1 of any software is full of 'bugs.' Version 2 fixes all the bugs and is great. Version 3 adds all the things users ask for, but hides all the great stuff in Version 2."
(9) "Any software costing over $100, or with documentation of over 100 pages, is too complicated."
(10) "You probably were better off with 3x5 cards and a typewriter in the first place!"
There are ways to "beat" these "laws" - but that could be the subject of a l-o-n-g article (and a 1-hour talk I've given to computer local clubs.)
I only offer these "laws" here to counter the enormous computer hype that is avalanching unsuspecting buyers who might well be satisfied with plain-vanilla used PCs, XTs or 286 machines with monochrome monitors.
"Word Certain 2.0 - The Ultimate Word Processor?"
by Fred Blechman
(C) Copyright Fred Blechman 1995
My friend, Mel Marcus, is a software freak! When he had his Commodore 64 years ago he collected hundreds of public domain and shareware programs. Then, when he got into the IBM PC world, he went nuts with shareware programs from computer bulletin board systems (BBSs) for years, downloading everything he could find.
Lately, like a growing number of cyber-freaks, Mel spends hours and hours roving around the electronic black hole known as The Internet, with its thousands of BBSs and "newsgroups" and their hundreds of thousands of downloadable files. So when Mel tells me he has found something new and exciting, I listen.
When Mel called me the other day and said "Fred, I've finally found it! I found it!" he got my attention.
"What did you find, Mel? I didn't know you were looking for anything."
Oh, yes!" he explained. "Ever since I started using microcomputers, I've been looking for a great word processor. I've found some good ones, but they were always too complicated. I do a lot of writing in my business, and I need something fast and simple.
"With the Commodore I used Paper Clip," he continued. "But since getting my first PC, I've found so many word processors to choose from, it's bewildering. Of course, there's WordStar and all its workalikes. I've tried MultiMate, VolksWriter, Leading Edge, WordVision, LeScript, The Word, WordPerfect, Word for Windows, and just about every one around. In the shareware world, I found PC Write to be about the most powerful.
"But," he continued, "they are all either too limited or too complicated. The manuals are hundreds of pages long. Printer installations can drive you bananas. And just about the time you learn how to use one of these word processors, they put out a new version that won't read the old text files! And the Windows versions - well, they confuse me altogether. So many buttons, bars, icons, and dialogue boxes, I get totally lost and can't find the things I used to use in DOS..."
"I know what you mean," I replied. "But you have finally found one you like? Tell me about it."
"Well", Mel started out, "it's called Word Certain 2.0. I've never seen it advertised, but I ran across it on the Internet. Best of all, it's not even shareware - it's public domain, so you don't even have to pay anyone to use it! It was written by a guy named Kevin Mitnick. I've got it on disk. You can come over and run the disk yourself. It's fabulous! I even wrote out a list of features that....."
"Hold it," I interrupted. "Can you send me that list right away? The deadline for the next issue of Nuts & Volts is coming up. Maybe I can tell the world about Word Certain 2.0."
"Sure, Fred. I'll drop it in the mail tonight."
A couple of days later I received the list from Mel. It's shown here in Table 1. I was impressed. I called Mel.
"Mel, you say you have Word Certain on disk. Can you send me a copy? I'd like to see for myself. I find it hard to believe. Can it really do all those things on your list?"
"Hey, Fred, it's unbelievable! Everyone has been after me for copies and it's been driving me crazy. I don't make a nickel on this. I'm out of blank disks and mailers. Why don't you come over and I'll let you run the disk?"
My curiousity was at a peak. This sounds like a natural article for Nuts & Volts. Larry and Robin love new stuff! Mel's place is only a few miles from me, so I made an appointment with him that afternoon.
When I got to Mel's door I recognized the yellow pad and pencil he always had on his door for notes. There was a note for me: "Fred: Had to leave for a few minutes. Come on in. The computer is on and ready."
I went inside and there was Mel's 486 multimedia monstrosity. On the screen it said, "Type DIR, press Enter, then look at README.1ST." I typed DIR and pressed the Enter key. The screen showed a bunch of files like WC.EXE, WCINSTAL.EXE, WCHELP.DOC and README.1ST. I typed TYPE README.1ST and pressed Enter. The screen went blank then displayed this message:
LOOK AT THE CALENDAR ON THE WALL, THEN TURN AROUND.
I looked at the calendar. It said April 1. I turned around to see Mel standing there, grinning from ear to ear, and holding out a yellow pad and a slim, yellow pencil with a nice rubber eraser on top.
"Here's Word Certain 2.0. Like I told you, it's unbelievable. See," he said, holding out the pencil, "the top is software, the wooden part is hardware, and the point is the printer. The world's simplest word processor..."
He's probably right! How can you beat a pencil and paper for simplicity?
************************* TABLE 1 ***************************
WORD CERTAIN 2.0 Main Features
(Compiled by Mel Marcus)
1.Instant access. No waiting for DOS to load.
2.All commands internal. No accessing disk for commands or overlay programs. No extended memory required.
3.270K storage capacity (about 45,000 words, or 180 double-spaced pages.)
4.Each character immediately stored to reduce chance of data loss.
5.Instant error correction with included utility.
6.Full search and replace functions.
7.Thesaurus and dictionary compatible.
8.Desktop publishing ability lets user specify layout, and freely create and import graphics. Automatic hand-scanning and image editing.
9.Prints out in selected colors.
10. Simple, easily understood commands.
11. Produces upper and lower case English and foreign characters, as well as proof-reading symbols.
12. Prints in many different fonts and sizes. Especially efficient for script fonts.
13. Does not require special printer installation or paper feed mechanism. Works with pin-feed or cut sheet paper.
14. Subscripts, superscripts, underlining, bold, enhanced.
15. Insert, delete, indents and other formatting functions.
16. Cut and paste for block moves.
17. Page numbering, headers, and footers.
18. Automatic on-line real-time spelling and grammar checker.
19. Import from Lotus, Dbase and other popular programs.
20. Can be modified by user without learning new language.
21. Easily transportable between different computers.
22. Does not conflict with memory-resident programs.
23. Multitasking. Can be used while computer is running a background program.
24. Data easily duplicated and shared with other users.
25. Can also create spreadsheets, forms, and data bases with no additional software.
26. Works with Mac or PC without modification.